by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

This society of ours values strength. The fittest survive, the best win, the strongest top the chart, and what not.

Being weak, on the other hand, is seen as a sign of, well, weakness.

The result is that many people put on facades of strength, while they are, in fact, soft as jelly on the inside.

This situation is hardly ideal.

Pretending to be strong is an extremely tiring and trying experience. It’s almost like a dormant yet sizzling volcano, awaiting its next, probably violent, eruption.

And one reason why men do not live as long as women is that we often coop our feelings inside, hiding weaknesses and only displaying expressions of strength on the exterior, no matter how fake they may be.

There is nothing wrong with being weak. And when the time is right for being weak, all the more people should be ‘allowed’ to be weak.

And what more telling time to be weak, than when mourning the passing of a loved one?

Talk, cry, whatever — do what is necessary.

Man or woman, young or old — it doesn’t matter.

It forms an important part of the grief and healing journey.

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