Learning to embrace grief and draw new strength and meaning from it.




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    Welcome to Living-With-Grief.com.

    Hi everyone. I'm Reuben. Living-With-Grief.com is inspired by the passing of my mum and dad through illness, in 2001 and 2005 respectively. I was 22 and 26 then. It hasn't been easy, and it has often been a painful experience.

    Why "living with" grief, as supposed to "overcoming" grief or "recovering from" grief? Because, even though I have moved on in my life, adapted to a new routine and embarked on new adventures, the grief has never fully left me - it comes and goes all the time. In fact, I suspect it might never do so. Sometimes, each passing of a loved one even seems to build on the other, deepening the hurt. The healing journey is long and laden with obstacles - it's been years, but I know I have not yet bade them farewell. And, I'm under no illusions - there will be more of such losses to come in the future.

    However, amidst the sorrow and tears, I have discovered nuggets of opportunity for peace and growth. I don't want to overcome my grief, and most certainly don't want to deny it. I want to learn to embrace it. The grieving journey has been a powerful experience, giving me new insights and perspectives on life. Life has never been the same again, nor will I ever be the same again. Through Living-With-Grief.com, I hope to share this journey with you, a journey of embracing our grief and drawing new strength and meaning from it. It can be done.

     

    See the most recent articles below:

  • Turn Your Focus Away From The Departed
  • Grief, Suddenly
  • They Live In You, Not In A House, Nor In Stuff
  • Reaching New Life Equilibriums
  • 9 Year Death Anniversary of Mother

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Welcome to Living-With-Grief.com.

Hi everyone. I'm Reuben. Living-With-Grief.com is inspired by the passing of my mum and dad through illness, in 2001 and 2005 respectively. I was 22 and 26 then. It hasn't been easy, and it has often been a painful experience.

Why "living with" grief, as supposed to "overcoming" grief or "recovering from" grief? Because, even though I have moved on in my life, adapted to a new routine and embarked on new adventures, the grief has never fully left me - it comes and goes all the time. In fact, I suspect it might never do so. Sometimes, each passing of a loved one even seems to build on the other, deepening the hurt. The healing journey is long and laden with obstacles - it's been years, but I know I have not yet bade them farewell. And, I'm under no illusions - there will be more of such losses to come in the future.

However, amidst the sorrow and tears, I have discovered nuggets of opportunity for peace and growth. I don't want to overcome my grief, and most certainly don't want to deny it. I want to learn to embrace it. The grieving journey has been a powerful experience, giving me new insights and perspectives on life. Life has never been the same again, nor will I ever be the same again. Through Living-With-Grief.com, I hope to share this journey with you, a journey of embracing our grief and drawing new strength and meaning from it. It can be done.

 

See the most recent articles below:

Coping With The Fear of More Loss

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

Perhaps, when we were very young, we innocently believed that life was all smooth and rosy and that all the people dear to us would be around with us for a long, long time, if not forever. Read more »

Hurt From The Loss of Many Loved Ones

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

In some ways, my grief experiences — the loss of my parents in my 20′s, which is earlier than most people — have hardened me to the possibility of losing loved ones. Read more »

Saying Those Last Words And The Final Goodbye

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

The loss of both my parents, although both to illness, were very different experiences. Read more »

The Importance of Being Weak

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

This society of ours values strength. The fittest survive, the best win, the strongest top the chart, and what not. Read more »

Keeping in Touching Distance of Others

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

As we mourn the loss of our loved ones, it is often tempting to retreat into a shell, to build a barrier and shut ourselves away from the love of others, and any interaction with them. Read more »

The Period After the Immediate Period

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

During the immediate period after the passing of a loved one, we are usually surrounded with care, concern and the support of friends, relatives and other associates. They ask how we are, they go easy on us, they console us, and they volunteer whatever help is needed. Read more »

Putting the Unhappiness Away

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

Certain materials are usually strongly associated with  the passing of our loved ones. Read more »

Those Familiar Faces

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

Every now and then, I see or meet someone who reminds me of my late father or late mother. It could be how they look, the way they speak, their personality, or just the way they move. Read more »

With Us Forever

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

I used to spend maybe a few hours a week with my parents. By “spend”, I mean we were physically together; how much quality time there actually was, is another question altogether. Read more »

Those Special Dates

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

There are a few dates every year which the gaping hole in my life left by my departed parents become more apparent than ever. Read more »