Learning to embrace grief and draw new strength and meaning from it.



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Grief Stages or the Grief Cycle

They Live In You, Not In A House, Nor In Stuff

This is something which I was in the process of writing almost a year ago, but I somehow got distracted. Am now revisiting this topic here.

In August 2010 last year, I moved into a new house. It wouldn’t exactly be a big deal – after all, people move all the time – except that I had lived in the same house all thirty plus years of my life. All the years I spent with my late parents, plus most of the best memories with them, took place in that house and its surrounding neighbourhood. Letting go of that wasn’t exactly an easy thing to do. Read more »

Reaching New Life Equilibriums

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

I realize it’s been a good 9 months or so since I last posted anything on this website.

To me, that can mean one thing – I have very much moved on in my life, and grief for lost loved ones no longer subsumes my everyday existence like it used to. Read more »

9 Year Death Anniversary of Mother

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

It’s been 9 years.

So many things have happened in those 9 years. Life has changed so much. In fact, the world has changed so much. Read more »

Dealing With the Belongings of a Departed Loved One – To Discard or To Keep

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

When a person passes on, it is inevitable that he or she leaves behind many “things” and belongings. This is even more so today, when everyone seems to have more “stuff” than in the simpler past.

And, generally, the bigger the house, and the longer a person has lived there without conscious effort to de-clutter, the more things he or she would accumulate over the years. Read more »

Have You Ever Been Part of a Funeral?

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

Have you ever attended a funeral? I’m quite sure you have.

But have you ever participated in one? Read more »

Hanging on to the Past: Mobile Number

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com 

When my mum passed on, my dad took over the use of her mobile phone and number.

Almost exactly four years later, my dad passed on, too. Read more »

One More Christmas With Them

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

It is the festive season again. Sometimes, I can barely believe how each year just zips by before us.

It is a pretty well-known fact that such seasons, where people spend time with loved ones, evoke strong, painful memories for those who have lost loved ones, and strong feelings of loneliness for who do not have loved ones. Read more »

Coping With The Fear of More Loss

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

Perhaps, when we were very young, we innocently believed that life was all smooth and rosy and that all the people dear to us would be around with us for a long, long time, if not forever. Read more »

The Importance of Being Weak

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

This society of ours values strength. The fittest survive, the best win, the strongest top the chart, and what not. Read more »

Keeping in Touching Distance of Others

by Reuben M. Chow, Living-With-Grief.com

As we mourn the loss of our loved ones, it is often tempting to retreat into a shell, to build a barrier and shut ourselves away from the love of others, and any interaction with them. Read more »